I try to be right, and show the correct answer to the situation very often. I come of as an asshole at times for my words. I try to show perspective and give a stand from another point of view, but I need to realize that even though "I know I am right" I do not necessary need to push that idea into others. I should be content with inner knowledge and outer connectedness to others though kindness.
2. Give up your need for control. “By letting it go it all gets done. The world is won by those who let it go. But when you try and try. The world is beyond winning.”
Control (the illusion of) is something we inherited from our human ancestors. Many times I try to be in charge of the situation, trying to bend it to my needs. I need to instead realize that each situation is it's own and I can only take as much from it. I should still try to be the best in any given circumstance but should not feel that things need to go a specific way. I must be more flexible.
Often, when plans don't go as I think they should, i throw a little emotional fit and get upset. I must be aware of this and take appropriate actions.
3. Give up on blame.
I don't think I am big on blames, rather I look at circumstances and attitudes. One can be changed and the other one is random. Blaming circumstances is useless, but evaluating my outlook onto things can be improved.
4. Give up your self-defeating self-talk. “The mind is a superb instrument if used rightly. Used wrongly, however, it becomes very destructive.”
I do think I can be better, stronger, more and less. I expect more from myself and from others. I don't find anything wrong with that. My self esteem is high, and I need to be aware of when I put myself or others down. Only upon being present in the moment can I adjust my attitude toward the situation or an action or a thought.
5. Give up your limiting beliefs. “A belief is not an idea held by the mind, it is an idea that holds the mind” This is something I definitely can work on more. I have grounded myself with assumptions, beliefs and ideas that are shaping not only what I see, but also what I don't see. Often, I have positive uplifting beliefs about my future accomplishments, but I'm sure the opposite happens often also. I need to broaden my beliefs about who others are and what they're capable of. The broader my perspective is, the better action and judgement I am able to go with.
The problem lies in distinguishing which beliefs are stretchable. There are certain fundamental blocks that we rely on, and switching those will inevitably reshape our existence. Perhaps for the best, since change is good no matter what. (or is this also a belief that limits me?)
6. Give up complaining.What do I complain about? I will have to come back to this one, since I try to see positive light in every situation. I complain about other peoples' perspective on life, and why they don't see the light I do. I must realize nobody on this planet is like me, and everyone had a life filled with experiences that naturally led them to this point in life. Complaining is forbidden.
7. Give up the luxury of criticism. Oh, the actions of others. How simple it is to see a a tiny misstep in others' actions, but so tough to notice a wrong detour we have taken in our journey. Judgement and oversimplicity are good relatives of criticism. There is, however, a positive spin on criticism - feedback. This is variable on the situation and those involved, so it must be catered individually. I'm not about fixing others (although i am), but about showing a better route to their destination. This can cascade to being right, to being in control, and all above mentioned. I must be careful as to how i present my advice to others, and I should not feel free so stump all their work because I know it better.
8. Give up your need to impress others. Oh man, but how? We live in a society where the more people like you the easier it is to navigate through life. Jobs, relationships, family, friends - all benefit for presenting a better picture of myself. This need is something of early human survival, where a person alone would inevitable perish, so being on the good side of the tribe was essential. Perhaps I can impress others on my humbleness (though it would be tough with my personality?). I don't consciously observe the need to impress others but only because I'm sitting at the computer right now, typing the words away, removed from the situation where social interaction is the key. I shall look into this closely, and again try to be aware of the ideas I have behind impressing others.
9. Give up your resistance to change. “Follow your bliss and the universe will open doors for you where there were only walls”
Always tough but I think I'm managing. I welcome change and try to see the benefits of any scene change. I grow everyday based on interactions and ideas bouncing around. All the little factors do contribute to who I think I am, who I'm trying to be, and who people see when they look at me.
10. Give up labels.. “The highest form of ignorance is when you reject something you don’t know anything about.”
But, but. Our brains love shortcuts. Labels is nothing conscious, rather acceptance and awareness of our labeling brains should be the norm. Every time I see or think of someone belonging to a group or owning a status, or any other put-in-this-box techniques, I should stop for a second and evaluate how much do I really know about the current situation. Only then I may be able to withhold the natural flow of labeling.
11. Give up on your fears. “The only thing we have to fear, is fear itself.”
Again, something natural, and life saving. But fear should not be the driver behind our actions (I have mentioned this sometime ago). Fear is a good indicator of potential growth, and that is what it should be used as.
12. Give up your excuses.
I was about to blame my human brain for excuses. Ha. I construct paths of cause and effect so effortlessly, I barely have to justify them. Are excuse and reason the same? Perhaps similar in the sense that they explain a certain result, but I feel an excuse has negative connotations where the blame is shifted on the circumstances instead of actions of an individual. There was heavy traffic on the way to work? Why didn't I account for it or looked online for traffic reports? Why didn't I leave earlier? Reasons behind our actions can be known or unknown, but that's not an excuse to shift the blame.
13. Give up the past.
Can't, and won't. Reflection on the past is incredibly important and it allows me to see how things have changed since [insert time period here]. I must take it with a grain of salt, however, keeping in mind that I didn't know back then what I do now. I mustn't dwell on the past, wishing it was different, or thinking 'if I only could go back'. Those are useless and time wasting. I do need to take into consideration that the only reason I am here today is because of past choices and circumstances. Past is important only as far as what it is - past.
14. Give up attachment.
I'm attached to routines and ordinarity of life. The normalcy of my mornings, the routines of social behavior, the expectations of myself and others. Inanimate objects, ideas, terrible investments that for some reason I keep holding onto thinking things will change. I'm attached to the technology, to luxury, to my thoughts and actions. The list goes on. Giving up may mean to stop relying on these factors so heavily. Though I can imagine a life without these attachments, to me they are far fetched (other countries, other neighborhoods, other people's lives) and somewhat abstract. Intellectually, I may be able to understand, but not on the emotional level. The ground at my feet is stable and I am grateful, but rejecting it without evaluation is hazardous. Perhaps I should be on the lookout of upcoming attachments and how I treat and conjure expectations from and for them.
15. Give up living your life to other people’s expectations.
Only the positive ones I should keep. Wait, positive from my perspective or those around me? The trouble with others is they see the world differently. Well, that's not really a trouble but a blessing to a certain extent. Advice I'll take any day, so long as it's bound on the experiences. Don't tell me not to jump if you have never jumped, because you know better.
But I myself have expectations of others, and it's not something I can let go of easily. This means I should not reject the outside, but see it as a helpful gesture. Fulfilling the prophesies of others is something entirely different. Next time someone suggests me how to live my life (without them being grounded on experience in a particular field), I must be thankful they take time and energy to help me, but also consider the consequences my life will have. Only I live with those.
2. Give up your need for control. “By letting it go it all gets done. The world is won by those who let it go. But when you try and try. The world is beyond winning.”
Control (the illusion of) is something we inherited from our human ancestors. Many times I try to be in charge of the situation, trying to bend it to my needs. I need to instead realize that each situation is it's own and I can only take as much from it. I should still try to be the best in any given circumstance but should not feel that things need to go a specific way. I must be more flexible.
Often, when plans don't go as I think they should, i throw a little emotional fit and get upset. I must be aware of this and take appropriate actions.
3. Give up on blame.
I don't think I am big on blames, rather I look at circumstances and attitudes. One can be changed and the other one is random. Blaming circumstances is useless, but evaluating my outlook onto things can be improved.
4. Give up your self-defeating self-talk. “The mind is a superb instrument if used rightly. Used wrongly, however, it becomes very destructive.”
I do think I can be better, stronger, more and less. I expect more from myself and from others. I don't find anything wrong with that. My self esteem is high, and I need to be aware of when I put myself or others down. Only upon being present in the moment can I adjust my attitude toward the situation or an action or a thought.
5. Give up your limiting beliefs. “A belief is not an idea held by the mind, it is an idea that holds the mind” This is something I definitely can work on more. I have grounded myself with assumptions, beliefs and ideas that are shaping not only what I see, but also what I don't see. Often, I have positive uplifting beliefs about my future accomplishments, but I'm sure the opposite happens often also. I need to broaden my beliefs about who others are and what they're capable of. The broader my perspective is, the better action and judgement I am able to go with.
The problem lies in distinguishing which beliefs are stretchable. There are certain fundamental blocks that we rely on, and switching those will inevitably reshape our existence. Perhaps for the best, since change is good no matter what. (or is this also a belief that limits me?)
6. Give up complaining.What do I complain about? I will have to come back to this one, since I try to see positive light in every situation. I complain about other peoples' perspective on life, and why they don't see the light I do. I must realize nobody on this planet is like me, and everyone had a life filled with experiences that naturally led them to this point in life. Complaining is forbidden.
7. Give up the luxury of criticism. Oh, the actions of others. How simple it is to see a a tiny misstep in others' actions, but so tough to notice a wrong detour we have taken in our journey. Judgement and oversimplicity are good relatives of criticism. There is, however, a positive spin on criticism - feedback. This is variable on the situation and those involved, so it must be catered individually. I'm not about fixing others (although i am), but about showing a better route to their destination. This can cascade to being right, to being in control, and all above mentioned. I must be careful as to how i present my advice to others, and I should not feel free so stump all their work because I know it better.
8. Give up your need to impress others. Oh man, but how? We live in a society where the more people like you the easier it is to navigate through life. Jobs, relationships, family, friends - all benefit for presenting a better picture of myself. This need is something of early human survival, where a person alone would inevitable perish, so being on the good side of the tribe was essential. Perhaps I can impress others on my humbleness (though it would be tough with my personality?). I don't consciously observe the need to impress others but only because I'm sitting at the computer right now, typing the words away, removed from the situation where social interaction is the key. I shall look into this closely, and again try to be aware of the ideas I have behind impressing others.
9. Give up your resistance to change. “Follow your bliss and the universe will open doors for you where there were only walls”
Always tough but I think I'm managing. I welcome change and try to see the benefits of any scene change. I grow everyday based on interactions and ideas bouncing around. All the little factors do contribute to who I think I am, who I'm trying to be, and who people see when they look at me.
10. Give up labels.. “The highest form of ignorance is when you reject something you don’t know anything about.”
But, but. Our brains love shortcuts. Labels is nothing conscious, rather acceptance and awareness of our labeling brains should be the norm. Every time I see or think of someone belonging to a group or owning a status, or any other put-in-this-box techniques, I should stop for a second and evaluate how much do I really know about the current situation. Only then I may be able to withhold the natural flow of labeling.
11. Give up on your fears. “The only thing we have to fear, is fear itself.”
Again, something natural, and life saving. But fear should not be the driver behind our actions (I have mentioned this sometime ago). Fear is a good indicator of potential growth, and that is what it should be used as.
12. Give up your excuses.
I was about to blame my human brain for excuses. Ha. I construct paths of cause and effect so effortlessly, I barely have to justify them. Are excuse and reason the same? Perhaps similar in the sense that they explain a certain result, but I feel an excuse has negative connotations where the blame is shifted on the circumstances instead of actions of an individual. There was heavy traffic on the way to work? Why didn't I account for it or looked online for traffic reports? Why didn't I leave earlier? Reasons behind our actions can be known or unknown, but that's not an excuse to shift the blame.
13. Give up the past.
Can't, and won't. Reflection on the past is incredibly important and it allows me to see how things have changed since [insert time period here]. I must take it with a grain of salt, however, keeping in mind that I didn't know back then what I do now. I mustn't dwell on the past, wishing it was different, or thinking 'if I only could go back'. Those are useless and time wasting. I do need to take into consideration that the only reason I am here today is because of past choices and circumstances. Past is important only as far as what it is - past.
14. Give up attachment.
I'm attached to routines and ordinarity of life. The normalcy of my mornings, the routines of social behavior, the expectations of myself and others. Inanimate objects, ideas, terrible investments that for some reason I keep holding onto thinking things will change. I'm attached to the technology, to luxury, to my thoughts and actions. The list goes on. Giving up may mean to stop relying on these factors so heavily. Though I can imagine a life without these attachments, to me they are far fetched (other countries, other neighborhoods, other people's lives) and somewhat abstract. Intellectually, I may be able to understand, but not on the emotional level. The ground at my feet is stable and I am grateful, but rejecting it without evaluation is hazardous. Perhaps I should be on the lookout of upcoming attachments and how I treat and conjure expectations from and for them.
15. Give up living your life to other people’s expectations.
Only the positive ones I should keep. Wait, positive from my perspective or those around me? The trouble with others is they see the world differently. Well, that's not really a trouble but a blessing to a certain extent. Advice I'll take any day, so long as it's bound on the experiences. Don't tell me not to jump if you have never jumped, because you know better.
But I myself have expectations of others, and it's not something I can let go of easily. This means I should not reject the outside, but see it as a helpful gesture. Fulfilling the prophesies of others is something entirely different. Next time someone suggests me how to live my life (without them being grounded on experience in a particular field), I must be thankful they take time and energy to help me, but also consider the consequences my life will have. Only I live with those.
Taken from this post on PurposeFairy
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